Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Ahhhh..The Holidays Are Coming..Whether I Like It Or Not

Well, Christmas is officially on it's way. Only 2 days away.
I'm in such a strange place. I'm not in the "Christmas Spirit" at all. And this is very unlike me.
I am usually one of those people who get so excited about the holidays. I have about ten totes filled to the brim with Christmas decorations, dishes, a Dickens Style village, and an enormous Santa figurine collection.
Every year before, you would walk in my house into a house that looks like Christmas threw up all over it.
This year, I had to be forced to get a tree. And the decor is at a bare minimum.
What is wrong with me?
This is kind of what I'm dealing with:


Okay, this is not really my house but you get the idea.

And Now:

Sad, isn't it?

The funny thing is, though, is that nobody has noticed. Well, I have but none of the other people in the house haven't noticed a thing.

None of the children have said "Hey mom? Where's the Dickens villiage that you always tell us not to touch?" or "Where are all of those weird Santas that you stick everywhere around the house?"

It's amazing. They're as happy as can be and they don't even care that it's the bare minimum.

Which leaves me to wonder, who the hell was I doing all of that for? The hubs could have cared less, the kids seem almost relieved that there's nothing that they will be yelled at if they touch, and I'm not exhausted from putting everything out and then dreading putting it all away when the holiday was over.

It's all kind of strange and wonderful at the same time.

Another thing that has changed about this Christmas is that we are staying home for the first time ever. Before, we always traveled to see family. We would either fly to Arizona to see my inlaws. And while it was always nice to see both of them (I mean that, I have truly been blessed with wonderful in-laws) have you ever tried to fight through an airport with three little kids and a thousand carry-ons, rushing to your gate so that you don't miss your flight only to find out that it's been delayed for three hours?

So, you open the carry on that has all of the activities that you were planning on using for the plane and try to entertain them for three hours. Then you finally get on the plane for the five hour flight and you've spent all of your activities in the airport and the kids are bored and they don't want to sit still and the guy in front of you reclines his seat as you're bent over, digging through bags trying to find snacks or ipods or DVD players. You finally find that thing that your one child wants and she's happy but then the other asks for something so you're digging again and that is the moment that your two year old son decides to find out how the table works and it slams down on the back of your head. And you're trying not to lose it because you haven't even LEFT THE GROUND YET but it's getting really hard. Then there's the endless trips to the bathroom and then the baby decides to poop and have you ever tried to change the poopy diaper of a toddler in an airplane bathroom????

The times we didn't fly to Arizona, we normally drove to Connecticutt to see the rest of the hubs family and while driving is a little better than the plane, there's the endless potty stops and complaints about being cold/hot/bothered/unhappy with the world in general.

Then you get to your destination, where a family member has offered to let you stay in their guestroom and sleeping arrangements are insane and you really don't want the kids touching anything in the house. And you're spending the whole time trying to convince the hubs' side of the family that just because you are from West By God Virginia, you are not a hillbilly and yet your children are walking around acting like the Clampets and you just want to scream!

Now, don't get me wrong, I love seeing the family but I always end up stressed out because I want my children to look perfect and act perfect and WHO ARE WE KIDDING? They are children!

So, this year, we have decided that we are making Christmas all about us and our little family of five. We are going to have the traditional Catholic/Italian Christmas Eve dinner of seafood and then we're going to watch...oh I'm so giddy about this!!!!....The first one of the marathon of A Christmas Story on TNT!!! I have watched that marathon every year of my existence and I love it. Then we'll wake up Christmas morning and open presents in, get this, our pajamas!!!! Then the hubs will make his famous "Big Breakfast" and I am going to make a Christmas dinner that involves making my first ever turkey. Pray for us that I don't kill us all from salmonela!

It may not sound as exciting as going to Arizona or Conecticutt but it's going to be ours and I can't tell you how happy I am about this.

Now, if I could just get that Christmas Spirit that everyone is talking about.....

Friday, December 12, 2008

Um, Say What?

This is my 20th post on this blog. It's funny to me since I have 665 on my other one.
So, do you ever sit down and start thinking about life and your MS comes to mind and even though you already knew it, it hits you again:

Wow, this IS for the rest of my life. Holy S*%t!

Maybe it's still the fact that all of this is still new to me and, honestly, it's made my life really crappy for the last eight months, but I honestly do have those times when that thought comes to my head.
For instance, my oldest monkey came up to me the other night and said "Remember when we made those plans to go to Disney World in a year? That's still happening right?"
Without thinking, I said "Sure honey, why wouldn't we be going? We already have reservations and things. Why would you think we wouldn't go?"
"Um, well, because of your MS."
And I sat there for a second and it hit me, oh yeah, I'll still have "my MS" in a year, right. Cause it's here forever. Right.

I guess I'm still getting used to all of this.

But there could be perks to going to Disney now.

I'll have my scooter and by then I plan on switching out those wimpy wheels and horn for something more, how shall we put this? Substandstial?

Yeah, like that but only four more of those.

And the horn we've already discussed.

Oh, there will be danger, my friend. In fact, Danger is my middle name. (Actually it's not but I was on a roll of coolness.)

On a serious note, I've made myself a goal. I'm calling it the:

"No Weather Permitting Will Be Said Goal"

I know that doesn't make sense but I can help you. During the winter months, whenever my mother is making any plans to come and visit us, at the end of every conversation she will say "Of course, you know, this is all Weather Permitting, right?"

I don't want to tell my kids "Yeah, we'll go to Disney, As Long As Mommy Feels Good. It's the same difference, to me atleast. Because, just like snow in the winter, we all know that we can go from feeling great to poo in 2.4 seconds.

So, I am keeping our plans. If I need to add a nanny, I can handle that. In fact, we might do that anyway. But my children will see enormous rodents next spring!

How do you all manage family vacations?

Friday, December 5, 2008

A Huge Thank You And Some Random Thoughts

I hope that you all have noticed that Sarcasm, Kids, and MS has been pimped out!
You have noticed right?

Ok, I'm gonna stop for a minute and you take the time to look around......


It's awesome, I know!
I owe it all to AngieSS who writes at the blog Cup of Snarky. Thanks Angie!!!
It's funny how it all came about, Angie pimping out my blog.
See, I went over to visit one of my favorite people, Bee at BeesMusings and I realized that everything was different and amazing. Bee had been pimped!
I then read her post where she bragged and rubbed in everyone's face about how AngieSS had pimped her blog all out and look at what a great job she did.
So, in the comments, I wrote something completely subtle and humble cause that's just who I am (stop laughing!). I think my comment went something like "I sure wish Angie would come and pimp my blog. I'm so bored with it. It's actually considering jumping off a bridge cause it's soooo boring." (I'm not talking about Sarcasm, I'm talking about my other blog Rambling Thoughts)
A few days go by and I had actually forgotten about that comment (ha, along with about a million other things) when I get this email. Angie wanted to pimp me out! So she did! And I sent her an email, thanking her from the bottom of my heart, and I may have mentioned that I had another blog she could pimp..hint hint...and she did!
I have to say, I am so thankful to her that she did because I tend to be a bit computer illiterate. Seriously! For example, I just now learned how to use the Paint program on my computer. And isn't Paint like a gagillion years old?
So, Thank you so much Angie! I love the new look and Lord knows, I couldn't have done it without you!

In other news, I have been dealing with the mother of exacerbations!
The pain that I'm always in is doubled and yesterday I woke up talking like Forrest Gump (well, not exactly like Forrest but that's kind of how I feel. I keep feeling like I should say "I'm not a smart man Ginny, But I know what love is!"), and my balance is way off. I mean WAY OFF.
Let me try to explain it to you: Most people know when they're standing up or even when they're falling over right? Well, I feel completely normal until I feel myself hit the floor.
What is up with that?
And as most of you know, having your eyes closed doesn't help much but there are some times when you just can't help it.
For Example: My neurologist asked me if I closed my eyes when washing my hair in the shower. I said "Of course I do, have you ever gotten shampoo in your eyes? It hurts!"
By the way, I think this is why my neuro at Georgetown treats me, I tend to be a bit entertaining.
Anyways, he says "Well, you've got to stop it. Wash your hair with your eyes open so that you don't fall."
And I've tried to do it but the thing is, it's been built into my daily habits. When I was "Little Tracy" and my mom was teaching me how to wash my hair, she told me to "keep my eyes shut". And then there would be times when I would forget to shut my eyes and the soap would get in and I would start screaming things like "Owe! Soap is in my eyeballs! Owwwwwww!" and I remember my mom saying "Well, I said to keep your dadblamed eyes shut! Whatsamatter with you??"
So, yeah, now I am having trouble keeping my eyes OPEN when I know that they should be SHUT. And I really don't think that this is where I intended on going when I started writing about my flare up but, hey, the mind has a...um....mind of it's own right?

And I'm still not in the "Christmas Spirit" and I don't mean all of those crazy shoppers version of the Christmas Spririt where you have to trample and shoot people.
I'm just not feeling it this year.
Normally, we would get a tree the weekend after Thanksgiving. This year, still no tree.
I have totes of decorations that are always put out the same weekend as the tree. This year they are still toted.
I don't know why I'm feeling like this. Does this fall into the "First Year of MS" category or is this something all it's own?
Well, one thing I did do was get the kids Christmas portraits taken. And that is what I'll leave you with.